The submissive's superlative syndrome
I met "latest mistress" last week. In several years, I had never met a woman so beautiful and intelligent. A unique dominatrix, like no other.
• The superlative's syndrome
According to Cambridge dictionary, superlative :
the form of an adjective or adverb that expresses that the thing or person being described has more of the particular quality than anything or anyone else of the same type
After having generalized about dominant females, I now wish to make the same mistake with submissive males.
I started to think about this generalized trend by reading the review of a submissive, following a session with a woman, very "girl next door" type, who offers foot fetishism with or without domination, at her home.
He was a young submissive, and this session was his very first experience. He came out and wrote something like: "No doubt, xxxxxxxxx is the best dominatrix in France".
I just took an drastic example above.
But this superlative's syndrome can even be seen in experienced, sensible, intelligent men who are used to meet women who master the art of intensity.
Everywhere, everywhere... whether it is the FetLife profile of a submissive, a review on the website of a professional mistress... You have a very good chance of finding "the most..."; "the only..."; "I had never seen..."; "the first time that...", etc.
Of course, sometimes it's true! There are always exceptional moments in the session that are placed above many others.
But this phenomenon of the superlative is far too systematic for it not to be indicative of a victory of emotions over reason.
I talk about it all the better as I myself am concerned, and was even more concerned before. I re-read the post-session email I sent three years ago to a professional mistress. I don't recognize myself, I'm almost ashamed of myself!
• The reasons of the syndrome
To thank by exaggeration
Almost systematically, the comment is left at the dominatrix's address. The submissive expects her to read it, which she will surely do. I think it has a lot to do with it.
The submissive, still upset because of the strong emotions -but also (especially?) because of his own unconscious projections on the dominatrix and the experienced scene- wishes to give back to this woman who gave him so much. A heartfelt thank-you, softer than the rough paper of the banknotes.
The question is whether it really affects the addressee or by reading that much superlative each time she cannot help but cringe at times in the reading. I'm not implying anything, I'm really wondering.
I wish I could get inside the head of a pro dominatrix! There must be so much to tell.
In the pursuit of more and more approval
The women affected would talk about it much better than I do, but I think that one point that many submissives have in common is the search for approval and validation by his Mistress for a day or for ever.
So, even after the session, each superlative allows you to increase your score on the scale of: "ah! What a great slave! I will miss him, I already do!".
Well, that's what the submissive may think at least. A way to further express all his devotion.
It's the heart that speaks, not the head
As already mentioned, the intensity of the emotions and scenes experienced during the meeting is enough to explain this loss of lucidity.
Also, considering that it is THE BEST that made you experience all this, that offered you so much depth, such a meeting with yourself; allows you to put a meaning on these strong emotions. To understand to better digest.
It also allows you to pet your own ego somewhere, considering that you have made the right choice by going to see THIS person and not another. After all, it is the best!
• How to cure the syndrome?
Or rather... Should it be cured? I don't think so!
These superlatives are certainly part of the daily life of the dominatrices to whom they are addressed. They have the benefit of hindsight, probably even more than I think.
Also, damn it, sometimes, moderation sucks. You don't come to expose yourself physically and psychologically in front of a woman to stay moderate. It's a waste of time.
I will continue to smile, looking amused and shaking my head, reading some reviews or descriptions (in the same way that some people probably have already done when they read me!). But I want it to continue!
I want the pure newbie to continue to think that the first woman who put her smelly feet under his nose is the best dominatrix in the world. Then, eventually, he will meet another one, and he will realize that every dominatrix has her own qualities and strong domains.
I want the experienced 50-year-old submissive to continue to consider the last mistress visited as the most perfect he has known in many years.
First of all, because maybe it's true (ah!). And also because even if it wouldn't be, it's natural to want to flatter more than reason this Mistress of intensity, even if it's not necessarily conscious, as the emotion experienced yesterday always seems more vivid, more burning, than the same emotion experienced 2 years ago... And the people who go with it.
May the magic continue, may the fire burn!